Our Christmas Wishes

Bella and I made our Christmas wish list today. As you can see below, we both need new toys. Ours wear out to easily. Top photo, I rip up my new duck. Bottom, Bella tears up her new goose. Total lapsed time till we had them in shreds on the floor, five minutes. Bella and I have made our own list of what we wish for Christmas. Since Top 10 lists are the vogue, here is our Christmas wish list.

We wish for:

1. Toys with a 90 day warranty. Why do they give one year warranties on TV sets or automobiles, but not dog toys? They won't even give us the option of buying an extended warranty. They make toys weak on purpose to cut our fun short. If we get five minutes from a toy it has lasted longer than normal.


2. Cats without claws. If cats have to have claws, at least give them a better disposition. It would help if they shed less, their hair keeps getting in my food. No matter what brand dog food they give me, it still tastes like cat hair.


3. Squirrels with a limp. Is it too much to ask for a slow squirrel or two? Maybe a fat one would be slightly slower. Molly caught a squirrel, but so far Bella and I have not even come close.


4. A car of our own, with open windows. Even if it only sits in the back yard, we can sit with our heads out the window and feel the wind in our hair and let our ears flap in the breeze. That collie down the road will be really jealous.


5. Our own drivers license to go with our own car. We could go for a ride to the dog park any time we wanted. The humans don't believe we can drive, they say we would never be able to keep our heads inside long enough to drive straight ahead.


6. Handles down low on the cabinet where the dog treats are kept. We can not open the door and they are very stingy with the treats. Begging for treats is so demeaning don't you think?


7. A heated year- around swimming pool. Having the pool closed for 6 months is really hard to take. What is a swimming dog to do without his daily swim fix? No, baths are a very poor substitute!


8. Trees with bones on them instead of apples. Sure, apples are good, but a bone tree in the back yard would be wonderful. Instead of having to beg for a bone we could just go out the dog door to the back yard and pick one.


9. Leashes made from paper-mache. When we smell something along the path that needs further attention, the human can go on without us. When a tree needs smelling or a friend goes by and needs sniffing, we can do what dogs need to do without that pesky pulling and yanking on our collar.


10. Homes for all of the homeless and unloved dogs in the rescues and kennels everywhere. Santa, empty chain link pens in shelters and empty crates in puppy mills everywhere would be a great Christmas gift.

Bella and Mogley G. Retriever