It's my Job!

Some people do not understand the role of a dog in the typical household. We appreciate the warm home, good food, exercise, attention and praise that we receive. In return we more than pay for our keep by providing valuable services.

• It is my job to guard the back fence. Don’t yell at me to stop barking when someone is walking down the trail in the park. They are walking quietly with their dog, plotting how to jump over the fence and invade our back yard if I appear to be asleep.


• It is my job to fetch balls. If there are no balls being thrown, then I can not perform my job. So hurry up, get out of that chair, turn off the TV, get outside and work that arm. No tennis balls? Sticks and Frisbees work as well. Throw a duck from time to time just to break the pattern.


• It is my job to take you for walks and to keep you physically fit. Excercise is good for the man and his dog, just ask your Doctor!.


• It is my job to chase the cats. So don’t yell at me to stop. The cats are getting fat and lazy, exercise is good for them. If they are running, then they are not shedding on the couch, or even worse, lying on your lap, digging their claws into you as they purr. If you spoke cat, you would be horrified at the nasty comments they make about humans. I only chase them when they have been insulting you.


• It is my job to clean up stray food on the floor. If there is no stray food on the floor then I can’t do my job. That is why I sprawl across the kitchen floor where you can trip over me, spilling your plate. It’s my job.


• It is my job to greet guests at the front door. You should encourage me to bark at everyone entering the front yard until it has been determined whether they are visitors and guests or intruders. Jumping on guests as they enter the house is only good courtesy; you would not want people to think we were not excited to see them? Sniffing is how we separate wanted guests from intruders bent on harm.


• It is my job to hang out of the car window, ears flapping in the breeze, keeping watch for threatening cars and approaching fire trucks. I stand watch over the car when it is parked in a lot, challenging any potential intruder who comes close. Forget buying the “club” or “lo-jack” for your car, just leave the window down while you shop and don’t forget to return with a treat.


• It is my job to be a companion and best friend. Jumping up on you is my way of helping you relax after a hard day. Licking you is my way of offering my sympathy and showing my understanding of your troubles. Offering you my head, ears and tummy to scratch is therapy; it saves you a trip to the psychiatrist’s office, not to mention saving you the bill. You could spend some small part of the savings on dog treats and dog toys.


• It is my job to protect the house, the family, and yes, even the cats, from possible intruders. That is why we are frequently awake in the middle of the night, keeping watch, guarding the home.

That is why we have been with you for the last 8,000 years, man and dog, what a team! Thanks for the home and love, your best friend;

Mogley G. Retriever